By Brian Robinson.
“Can you help me please? I don’t want to die.”
“I’m sorry sir, you must have pressed a wrong number. You’ve come through to planet Earth. On planet Earth, everyone dies. That’s just the way it is.”
“What shall I do then?”
“You could try transferring to another planet. I know for sure there’s one in universe 14 where no one dies.”
“That’s absolutely brilliant. Thank you soooooo much. You’d better tell me what it’s called.”
“Hell. It’s known as planet Hell.”